Narcotic Release*

My head spins, swirls, jets
Twisting end-over-end
Crossing streets and yards
Flying, soaring
To land in cold puddles
Like a brittle maple leaf
Pirouetting on November’s wind.

The narcotics in my veins
Purposed to kill the constant pain
Removes the burden of fire
Doing nothing to extinguish the blaze.
But, oh! The dizzy trail I thread
Splices me to life
Hell-for-leather and hold on tight.

Sometimes I feel my hand slipping
Slipping
And fear joins the pursuit.
I wonder what it will be like
To catapult the balustrade
Slamming headfirst into the stone wall
The stone wall
With no chance to walk away
From the stone wall
Waiting for me
Just waiting for the next wild ride.


(* Explanation: I survived a massive cerebral hemorrage in '97, resulting in a pathology of severe neural pain, requiring treatment with federally regulated medications. On occasions of "off the chart" pain I have accidently over-dosed. The above is the frightening result.)