False Light

The desert moon
Bathes the canyon
In the palest of light
Misty blue
Cast over
Sienna and silver.

Nothing can be seen
By looking directly at it.
You must not look
At a thing
In this false light
To note its place.

How like this desolation
Are you
Sweet lover!

You are lost to my gaze.

Though I seek you
You are past finding.

When I’m not
Looking for you
There you are.

The woman at the bus stop
Had your smile
A child with a rag doll
Your innocence.

I bought a cup of coffee
From a woman
Who had your hands
Your bright red nails.

I see you
When I’m not looking.
When I’m not looking
You are everywhere.

A woman at the café
Laughed like you.
I laughed too
Just to remember how it felt.

I turned the corner
Into the parking lot
And was surprised
By a cool, fresh breeze
Playing at my temples
Cupping my face
Kissing my joyless lips.

I swallowed hard.
The wind rushed my throat
Tumbling into my belly.
You were there.
You were the wind.

You’re there when I’m not looking.